Monday, 17 January 2011



He was born in the war and he died in New York
His second wife was Japanese
He fell out with Paul McCartney
He wore glasses and a white suit
He was from Liverpool
He was probably a tiresome prick
That’s why Christopher Eccleston was a shoe-in to play him at some point.


John’s middle name was Winston.
Obviously his parents were feeling patriotic.
Hell, they weren’t going to call him Adolf, what would the
Neighbours have said?
Liverpool was his hometown, he didn’t support them or
Everton which prevents either team cashing in on his
No they named a fucking airport after him instead.
Oh well, at least they didn’t name it Woman is the
Nigger of the World airport..


I was thinking of writing a poem
Incorporating loads of Beatles song titles
But then my dad said Barclay James Harvest
Did that years ago.
So I shot the bastard in a pique of meta-irony.

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